Darkness....then LIGHT.

Hi again!

In my last post, I hinted about how things have not really been going OK with me mentally....well, on completing my book on The balanced Christian life, I became very depressed! Like I had zero will to do anything. Why is life so hard? I asked myself, Why do we suffer so? Why do good people suffer? What is the point of it all? I am Ugly!...yeah I got there....I cannot be who He wants me to be, I am a failure! It is hard to succeed at anything!  I was in a very dark place. I resorted to a very bad habit I am trusting God to help me overcome and naturally I felt worse with myself. I struggled to get out of bed and face the world, poured myself into work, but when I got back , I retreated into this dark place.

Deep in my heart I cried out....'Save Me Abba'

And what He whispered in my heart amazed me..... 'Dammie, I have saved you, this one is on you, you need to snap out of it! I have given you all that you need that pertains to life and godliness, so snap out of it!You know who you are in me so stop believing lies! and while you are at it, stop being so hard on yourself! give yourself a break!'


 :O ....I was 'shockprised!'  I sure was not expecting that! Hmmmm. Chale! Still pondering on that.

So lets us just say, I snapped out of it! It tried to rear its ugly head severally, but I am a survivor!!


I have a friend, she is also going through this 'darkness' and I spoke to her about what the Holy Spirit told me, another friend had told her the same in not so many words....I pray she finds her way out as well. I pray she feels Abbas love like never before! Amen.

As I was discussing with her, something dropped in my heart...something really profound that has just helped me put things in perspective...like!!!!


I heard a question, Dammie, why do you think you are on earth? Why do you think man is here?....A lot of us actually feel like the earth is some 'holiday getaway' or 'Airport lounge' where we lounge and have fun, amass wealth and 'oppress' those that we can in the name of blessings......Naaah, that is not why we are here! We are not here for the 'comfort' of man. The earth is actually a refiners fire, and we will ALWAYS feel the heat. The reason we are here is to learn obedience through the things we suffer...It is so that like gold, we can come out pure like He intended. It is so that we build strength of character, the character of a leader, of a ruler, of a 'Son'. And that is what Jesus came for.....to show us the WAY! The TRUTH!, and The Life! .


So the earlier we grow some thick skin, the better. Knowing that whatever happens, as a saint, there is a purpose, a greater good.....though we go through fire, it will not consume us....ALL things are working together for our good!!


And all I can say is that I felt Peace! I trust Abba, I trust the work he is doing in me!! I trust that He is able to make me into who He intended me to be!


I trust Abba! and that is enough!!!


I SEE LIGHT......Do you?

Living a Balanced Life

Wow!

I cant believe it is over a week I blogged! mehn my fingers have been so itchy but I really wanted to keep to my promise.

So, I finally finished going through my audio book  The Balanced Christian Life and I really do not know where to begin! I am a changed being!

I am highly recommending this to anyone who feels overwhelmed with life! Anyone who cares about how they live life, and anyone who cares about living optimally.

The things I learnt:

• The importance of living a balanced life - the truth is as long as one aspect of our life suffers, our LIFE suffers! It is impossible to have success in just one area of your life, it is only a matter of time before the failed areas bring it down! Major life areas include: Spiritual, Physical , Social and Mental.

• Living on purpose - Defining one's reason for being. You know how they say imagine you struggle to climb to the top and after it all, on getting to the top, you realize the ladder has been leaning on the wrong wall. That is what happens when we refuse to define purpose at the beginning. WHAT DO I HOPE TO ACHIEVE WITH MY LIFE?

                  
                  Finding purpose is what inspires us to do what needs to be done day by day. 

           

           What I love about this book is that you actually also get a workbook that helps you through a               step by step process of discovering and defining your purpose if you don't already know it. 

• Goal Setting with God - I particularly love this. You see, a part of me felt setting goals was sort of useless especially as a christian. You see, the church has sold us this "faith" life where we feel all we need to do is just pray really hard and somehow all of our life will fall in place...A big lie from the pit of hell!!! As Christians, we must set goals....make our vision plain and run with it! I love love love the step by step process in the workbook as well. How to list action plans that one must embark on to achieve the goals. And more importantly I love that it touches all the core area of our life. 

• Lastly, Simplifying One's life! See life is not hard, and we really need to just take things easy, yes I know there is an urgency that comes with living but simplifying our life ensures we only do things that really matter, ensures we give adequate time to de-stress an refuel. I for one have learnt a long time ago that getting yourself stressed over issues or work is counter-productive. It is impossible to function optimally when stressed. Really learnt a lot about how to simplify and plan ones day to achieve the highest impact on our overall purpose. And of course a super reward and renewal system. 

Gosh! this post feels super long! Yhoor! My apologies, I really am just super excited! 

Now I need to say that it is not like suddenly my whole life is perfect! In fact, far from it. Like never before I have been so depressed....(I will discuss this better in my next post.) The devil knows I am on the right part and he is doing all he can to frustrate the work in me BUT, I am an overcomer, I HAVE OVERCOME! 

Still working through my workbook, really want to take my time with that one. Hopefully, I will talk to you about that soon.


PS

If there is anyone out there, how are you doing? Chale, life can be really hard but hang in there....please hang in there. God is with you! You are loved!


Cheers

'Dammie

My open letter.

I know I said I was not going to do any post till I finished my tasks from the last post, but I just needed to get this out before my chest bursts......(I can be really dramatic Yhoor!)


So, please bear with me.


I feel so alone! Not alone as in lonely, but alone as in a-lone!...OK Dammie, that does not make much sense. :)

This is what I mean, I have not been with God much, I have not been dependent on Him, I have not really had any fellowship with him. I have talked to Him and He has spoken to me a few times, but our relationship is not in a good place right now. And yes I have just coasted for a while now but mehn, I am SPENT! I am bankrupt! So here is me writing a letter to Abba, and hoping, if someone reads this, you please mention my name to Him.

Dear Abba,

I NEED YOU!

My Spirit is poor and I turn to you. I know that you do not leave me, it is I who often crawls away from you. Why I do this I do not know especially since it is apparent that without you I am lost!

Draw me and I will run to you! Kiss me with the kisses of your mouth for your love is better than wine. My soul is thirsty for you, my Spirit seeks you. Draw me Abba....draw me!

Draw me into your presence once again, I want to behold the beauty of your holiness. I want to fall in love with you all over again! I want to be consumed by your love. I want to learn at your table. I want to be purified by the waters from your stream....till I am no more and you reign in me.

Draw me Abba! Please draw me to yourself.

I am empty and I need You!

Its me,

'Dammie.

       “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.” MATTHEW 5:3     

The Second Chronicle

Dammie, you really need to come up with a more catching post title don't you think?.....Its OK though, no pressure! lol.

So.....

I woke up this morning to a post from my favourite blog at the moment www.paulcampillo.com. Paul had blogged about "The miracle of feedbacks" and boy i couldn't get enough of it. What resonated most with me was I quote

"To correct mistakes quickly, to address situations before they get out of hand, and to acknowledge the elephant in the room is not just critical to progress, it gives you an opportunity to find and express your humanity"  - Paul Campillo

You see, yesterday, when I got home from work, I did some thinking....About how far I am from my goals, about how much I had derailed from my "perfect 2015", about how at the rate at which I was going, I'll probably be depressed come December. See, I did a whole lot of thinking, got slightly depressed, stuffed myself with some food and went straight to bed. Little wonder I haven't made much progress with my life.

This is not the first time my evening has gone this way....in fact, this month alone, I have had at least four nights that pretty much went the same way. I have this bad habit of just tucking away issues as if by some crazy chance they would all just disappear and the sun will be bright again. It is how I cope.

<enter Paul's words>

"What good does it do to get the message, then ignore it? What good is it to look at myself in the mirror, see those unwanted results, then go back to doing the same things?"


It is safe to say Paul hit me real hard this morning. Real hard!

I am going to change my life! At least I will make an effort  try my BEST! :)

So this is what I promise to do before my next post

• Finish my audio book on living a balanced christian life by Chip Brogden
• Revisit my 2015 Vision Board
• Review my 2015 Vision board. Set realistic goals. 

I hope to be able to come back here as soon as possible. 

Off to make some change

Cheers! 

'Dammie

The First Chronicle

Ok......So I have been sitting here thinking of a really cool first post. After a few minutes, I thought to myself Dammie, away with the drama...and Be!....be yourself that is :) 

So....

First things first.....some background.

I have always loved to write but never really got around to writing or taking it serious. I came across this article that however inspired me to start this blog. You can read here - Writing is thinking really. 

A line that stayed with me from the post is this - "If you’re not writing, I hope this post inspires you to write. You learn so much about the world, and most of all, yourself. " - Paul Campillo

So here I am, witting, about myself, to myself and everyone who cares to join in the ride.


What I hope to get:

• Have Fun!
• Mental Clarity
• Growth
• More Fun!
• Order
• Maybe a few friends :)
• Get to know "Me" better

Life Areas I will touch:

• Spiritual
• Mental
• Physical
• Social
• Financial

So, how's that for a first post. 

Cheers!

'Dammie